Well, Happy Saint Patrick's Day.
I spent the morning facilitating a workshop on creating Celtic Blessings
and came home feeling completely blessed.
Until of course, I heard the commotion coming from the guest bathroom.
It seems the wisemen are having "issues" with the leprechaun.
ME: What is all the noise about?
Wiseman #1: We want to issue a formal complaint.
ME: About what?
Wiseman #2: This gigantic green man you've put on our shelf.
ME: The leprechaun?
Wiseman #3: Yes. The leprechaun.
ME: What seems to be the problem?
Wiseman #2: His smirk.
ME: Leprechauns are known for being full of mischief.
That's just his mischievous look.
Wiseman #1: No! He's taunting us.
Wiseman #2: Yes, he keeps bragging about his gold.
Wiseman #3: And we are sure it's stolen. Call the police!
ME: Hold on. Calm down. You wee fellas get riled so easily!
Wiseman#1: He says that he will steal our gifts while we're sleeping.
ME: Um. Knowing how much you dislike my bringing up your
Wiseman #2: We'll make an exception this one time.
ME: Well look at his arm. It too is permanently attached to his gold.
Wiseman #1, #2, #3: SILENCE
ME: Do you realize that if a human captures a leprechaun he has to
give them 3 wishes in order to regain his freedom?
Looks to me like this could be your lucky day!
Here's your chance to get your arms unglued!
The wisemen moved to the corner to put their heads together to confer for several minutes.
Wiseman #2: We've made a decision.
Wiseman #3: Yes, We're at peace with the permanent position of our arms.
Wiseman #1: And so we are pooling our 3 wishes.
ME: So tell the leprechaun what you want!
Wiseman #2: We want YOU to remove him.
ME: And why would I do that?
Wiseman #2: Because we have evidence of your
fraternizing with the enemy.
ME: What are you talking about?
Wiseman #1: Look at this photo. You are one of them!
ME: OMG! Where did you find that ancient picture?
Wiseman #3: Never you mind! Please remove him
or we'll post this for all the world to know your true identity!
ME: Oh all right. But you need to know that I'm not a
real Leprechaun. I just play one to annoy my children.